Let me start out with who I am. My name is Amanda. I am 32 years old. I am married to husband going on 14 years this month. We have 7 wonderful little children.
I was raised with a Catholic background, but in my teenage years I decided to find the correct church for myself. After searching, and failing many times, I gave up. At 17, I met my husband and learned about Joseph Smith and The Book of Mormon. After we married, I took the missionary discussions and, while reading 1 Nephi, I had the Spirit bear to me the truth of The Book of Mormon and Joseph Smith. I joined the LDS church 13 years ago, and began learning and believing the early LDS teachings (became a fundamentalist Mormon) 8 years ago.
He and I have talked about polygamy all throughout our married life. We talked about how it was such a benefit and blessing to the women in the pioneer days and how sad it is that it can't be lived today. Then, we ended up moving to a community for a couple months that actually lived Celestial Plural Marriage. I was able to see it first hand and witness what a blessing it actually can be, if lived right. After leaving the community (we are still close friends with them), I have since made friends with many poly families and plural wives.
I have also faced the reality of living this law. It was hard for me at first. I have never been a jealous person, but I struggled with the thought of 'sharing' my husband. I did a lot of praying and fasting over the years. It took me a long time of prayer, scripture study and fasting. My fears came from my own insecurities. What if he loves her more than me? What if she's prettier? What if she's nicer than me? What if I don't get along with her? I don't want to mess it all up.
I know that he wouldn't love another wife more than me, nor me more than her. I know that if/when we find another loving woman to add to our family the he will lover her equally.
There are many that feel plural marriage is only about sex. However, those people don't understand the joy of plural marriage. If a man wanted sex, he could do that anywhere and not have to worry about raising and taking care of another family. If there is anyone who benefits, it's the women. They have a constant woman companion to be there and help her physically and spiritually. There are some things that woman are able to help other women with that a man just can't do. The women would get a lot more one on one time with her husband. There would always be another mother to watch the children so they can be together alone. Wouldn't that be nice?! I look forward to having a woman, friend and sister to talk to and raise our children together. To know that she is my equal and that she loves my husband, my children and myself as much as we lover her and her children.
I long for the day that we find a sisterwife, and when she will join our family. We will continue to fast and pray for the Lord to send her to our family. We will continue to fast and pray for the Spirit to tell us that she is the one for our family, and tell her our family is for her.
I know many don't agree. However, none of us agree with all of everyone's lives. I should be able to live my life how I feel is best, and you should be able to live your life how you feel is best. I feel it is nobody's right to make those decisions except those who's lives it concerns.